I remember reading The Forever War a while back, and the main point I took from that story is a person’s ability to adapt to a changing society.  It’s a sci-fi story where a soldier is under the effects of time dilation (e.g. he gets 1 week, earth gets 10 years) and when he comes back for shore leave, he barely recognizes the place.

Today’s pace of societal change is just absurd.  Go ahead and watch the Hangover (2009).  There are bunch of jokes in that movie that simply could not make it to the screen today.  Actions from 20 years ago are brought up and judged against today’s standards.  Those are pure time capsules, and to try and shoehorn today’s values on that time piece makes no sense.  As I’m sure in 50 years that society will look back on what we do today and think Holy Shit.

But that’s not to say that people are not trying to catch the wave of change, trying to make a buck.  There’s a reason they call it a wave, because if you’re not at the crest, then you’re done.  And it’s damn hard to stay at the crest, especially when that crest changes every other week.  The shock-jock stuff from the Logans seemed a somewhat natural evolution from the Jackass culture.  But as time has moved forward, it’s become less and less accepted, regardless of how much energy they put into it.  They need to change.

Then there’s the people who fight tooth and nail against the wave.  There are a million reasons why.  We all have relatives who seem like they live 50 years in the past and have no inclination to move forward.  Some for interesting reasons, others simply due to exhaustion of seeing all the non-stop change.

I remember being a kid in school.  There was a bunch of stuff I liked that my parents just didn’t understand.  At least is was physical (POG?) and tangible.  And the rate of change was moderate enough since it typically cost money to participate in a trend.  Kids today?  Trends are set on a daily basis, and almost entirely free to participate.  There were no ice bucket challenges when I was a kid, it simply wasn’t possible to have something that viral exist.  If I was to look at the top 15 Twitch Streamers (subjective, fine) I only recognize 5 of them.  Dr Disrespect is one who technically should be in jail right now (at least, he would be if it was in Canada.)  And that 6 month old list is now out of date.

One of the old school memes (2012 is apparently old school) – Overly Attached Girlfriend (OAG) – recently announced that she’s leaving the scene.  Technically she hasn’t been active in 2 years, but wanted a farewell.  It’s a poignant video, primarily due to the openness of the mental health issues that being a content creator imposes.  99% of those issues are created due to the internet culture.  I can only imagine how that impacts others who feel obligated to create non-stop. They get so involved in the lifestyle that they have no backup plan – just stream/create until they can’t.

I’ve been blogging for over 15 years now.  In that time, I’ve found side projects that paid a decent amount of money, and there were points where I considered doing it full time.  The problem then (more-so now) was that full time was many more hours than I’d work in normally.  I made a choice then, as I do now, to only do what I want to do and do it within timeframes I’m comfortable with.  Giving me a million dollars and making me work 200 hours a week… I’m good, thanks.  As a teenager, I don’t think I would have had that same perspective.

What a long winded post to get the the point where I simply shake my head looking at how society self-reflects today.  Wild swings of popularity, and the anonymity of the masses.  There are no mirrors anymore, just cameras.  Exhausting.

Away for a while now, taking advantage of the cottage, the lake, and the beer.  I hope others are able to take time away from their number boxes too!

It was a needed break from work.  I’ve been running with a rather short fuse lately, and that’s not fun for anyone.  I had some stress when leaving a fairly large work package, but I ended up delegating it through 4 different teams.  When I came back, things were in a good place.  Oh, there’s always levels of the dumb, but it’s at acceptable levels.

What’s real nice about the cottage is that there’s no real technology.  I had my phone for news articles (avoiding social media) but the amazingly solid weather had me out of doors nearly all the time.  Didn’t answer any calls from work, just full decompress.

Loon family & chick, with my youngest taking in the sights

I am quite fortunate to have both a cottage and one that’s about an hour’s drive from home.  The kids aren’t technology bound (‘cept perhaps a tad too much Netflix), and get to explore all parts of the outdoors.  Tangent time!

We had quite a few guests over the break, and a few of them are not the outdoors type.  It is really interesting to see how they (and their children) cope with the openness of the outdoors.  There are trees to climb, forts to build, rocks to throw, branches to burn, popsicles to eat, fish to catch, and importantly – bruises to acquire.  Compared to a more urban style, where you simply consume rather than create, it can give the appearance of boredom when in fact it’s a world of growth.  I’m quite glad that my kids get to experience both of those worlds, and have an appreciation for both.  I’m even more glad that other kids get to be exposed to it.

I will say that after 2 weeks of sun, boat & beer, playing hockey again the other night was a tad painful.  It is a worthwhile exchange, and shouldn’t take too long to get rid of the water weight.

Being away from tech for nearly a month means I have a bit of catch up to do.  A few bits on Steam to clear out.  Stranger Things 3 to get through.  Some books sitting needing some reading.  And some continued slowed breathing.

Stay zen folks.

10 days off work, 7 days at sea.  Worth. every. minute.

I took a cruise on Harmony of the Seas, on the Eastern Caribbean.  Wife, kids, and my dad.  My in-laws were in a condo near the port, so we spent some time with them before/after to avoid stress around flights.

I’m fortunate enough to afford vacations out of town.  We’ve gone to quite a few places in Canada with the kids.  We’ve done a few all inclusive resorts over the years – with the kids in Cuba and the Dominican.  My wife and I also took a couple cruises as a couple earlier (Celebrity line), though this was the first time with the kids.

On this cruise, we (at least one member) did:

• Beaches
• Pools
• Slides
• Water Park
• Flow Rider
• Zip Line
• Snorkeling
• Grotto exploring
• Waterfall climbing (Dunn’s River Falls)
• Catamaran
• Arcade
• Karaoke
• Shopping
• Comedy club
• Theater (e.g. Grease)
• Movies
• Ice skating (watched it… seriously)
• Water acrobatics
• 10 story slide (Ultimate Abyss)
• 26 of the 27 bars
• 9 different places to eat
• Self-serve ice cream
• Exercised / Ran
• Casino

I’m sure I am missing things.  To give you an idea of things to do, below is a picture of the planned activities for the last full day at sea from 7am until 5:30pm.  There’s even more stuff throughout the evening, up until 2am.

There’s about 100 things on this alone.  If you’re bored, it’s your own fault.

You pretty much only have to worry about showing up – everything else is taken care of.  Don’t get me wrong, I like resorts too.  But it’s hard to argue that the food quality, security, variety of everything, and general temperament of other guests in better on a ship.  More expensive – no question.  Worth.

Now back to ice and snow for a few more weeks.  Ah well, was a great trip.

Personal on this one.  My wife and I are celebrating our 10 yr anniversary in March.  We’ve been talking about a bunch of different things to do, which are all complicated by the fact that a) it’s during March break and b) we can’t realistically leave our kids behind for a week without some serious planning / support.

We’ve been fortunate enough to take the kids on quite a few trips over the years, including two down south.  We also took a couple trips on a cruise (just the two of us) and I personally enjoyed that experience more than an all-inclusive.  Thinking was to see if we could find a cruise that was more family-friendly – and that generally means Royal Carribean.

Also motivating – we’re both on the edge of burnout through work.  The winter holidays were good to refresh, but we are clearly in need of the “no need to make big decisions” for a while.

We ended up booking a trip on Harmony of the Seas.  That’s around 5,500 passengers at double occupancy.  And has full time kid activities if the wife and I want to do something else for a bit.  Oh, and an ice rink.  Ridiculous.

I was in the ship to the far right, and I thought that was immense.  HotS is the 2nd most right.

I am utterly fascinated by the logistics of running a floating city, with people talking different languages, and a very high standard of cleanliness and service.  Just the linen service takes an army.  If you ever have the chance to watch a documentary on how these things run, you should really take the time.

There is one port in particular – Labadee, Haiti – that is entirely self-served by the ship. Over the course of 2 hours, enough food/drinks are pulled off the ship to shore in order to support an 8 hour day at the beach.  Amazing coordination.

I won’t hide the fact that this is entirely a luxury, and one that we are lucky enough to afford.  Every time we bring our kids out on something, we make it a point to have them recognize this fact.  Entitlement is a concern for both my wife and I.  My kids experienced more by the age of 4 than I did until I was in my 20s.

It’s good to have things to look forward to.  Makes driving through feet of snow and ice a bit more bearable.  I’ll see what kind of photo collage I can put together when I get back.

/rant

The whole Gilette ridiculousness is just more hot air on a topic of division.  I get it, people are tired of being told what to do.  The irony here is that there’d be no need to remind them if they’d just treat people as people.

Being a man today is harder than it was 20 years ago.  No question.  But it was STUPID EASY being a man 20 years ago.  Everything in the world was built for a you.  Nearly all sports, school, jobs, cars, vacations, commercials, movies were built with a man in mind.  It was like shooting fish in a barrel.  A super example is China’s 1-child law, where boys were prized above girls, and where the projection is 30 million more men than women by 2020.  I could write a book about the social impacts of such a disparity.

I have 2 girls, and I live in Canada.  Honestly, they won the damn jackpot.  They don’t need to get married at 8.  They don’t need to work in a rice field instead of going to school.  They can’t be discriminated against in terms of career choice – they are measured as equals in terms of skill/knowledge.  We have access to high caliber women’s sports.  They are, by law, treated as equal.

But you know what?  They still have a 1/3 chance of being sexually assaulted.  They will be judged more by what they wear, than what they say or do.  They will be told that STEM is for boys.  They will have to always have to travel in a group, else risk being attacked.

The problem with laws is that we need them.  There are assholes all over the place, and most of them don’t even think they are assholes.  If you’re being told to not grope women, and you somehow find that offensive, then then problem is you.

Here’s a quick test that can help prove the point.  Name 10 male role models, and time how long that takes. Doesn’t matter what they do, as long as you think they are role models. Good?  Now do it again, but for female role models.  Did you even get to 10?

But I get it.  Men have been in power for centuries.  We’ve been raised that we are better.  We are stronger, wiser, and a dozen other -ers.  Bullshit.  Men are cowards.  Cowards hide, and lie, and complain.  Strength comes from sharing and growing with others.

When people learn that women can be as vindictive, as evil, as troll-like, as corrupt as men, maybe then they will get the equal footing that is still lacking today.  Women can be more destructive than men, no question.  When we start using the same rules for both, then we can have progress.  It has nothing to do with women being better than men.  It has everything to do with them being equal, judged by the same rules.  Not special treatment – equal treatment.

Feminism isn’t coming after football (CTE is).  It isn’t coming after beer (liver disease and drunk driving are).  It isn’t coming after your job (merit-based appointments, and automation are).

This /rant brought to you by stupid people, who think that their mothers, wives, daughters, and friends deserve less respect than their male counterparts.

Technology is a tool, how we use it depends on who we are as a people.

I like blogging, I like reading other bloggers.  I tend to follow bloggers that have interesting stories, and points of view.  The ramblers are as fine as the short and sweet.  I find that I generally agree with most view opinions, though rarely in their entirety.  I do follow some folks just to see the other side of the fence, because it’s good to have differing opinions.

I think I fall in line with the majority of urban Canadians in my age group, when it comes to general views.  I know that my parent’s generation tends to be more fiscally conservative and less socially liberal.  We tend to be fiscally conservative, and socially liberal.  I do not agree with most “winged” party views, as a lack of balance on any one of those items causes a massive shift over time.  The world is just too complicated to boil it down to broad statements of X will do Y.  And while I live in a city in Canada, I also share the planet with 7 billion other individuals.  That sense of scope makes it a really hard to get past our own personal Monkeysphere.

I used to have a large list of “friends” on Facebook, back when it was used to provide personal updates.  That was replaced by Twitter.  Which is replaced by a dozen other tools.  I stopped using Facebook a few years ago when it became pretty clear that the feed was focused on link dropping.  Most of those links were sensationalist opinion articles, that progressively got more and more out there.  It became an echo chamber.  And frankly, Facebook is one of the worst ways to have a debate/conversations on a topic.  I kept Facebook for the contact information and group invitations, but ended up deleting it nearly 2 years ago when I realized there were better options out there.  I still keep Twitter, but I’m not quite sure why.  The early intent was sound, but short sound bites make for a dumb population when trying to be used as a news machine.

Finding differing view points, dissecting their arguments, and coming to your own conclusions is important.  Being able to defend a position with reasonable arguments is the foundation for decision making.  Arguments that include the words “any”, “all”, or “always” tend to be self-defeating, yet that’s what gets the clicks/eyes/ears.

Confirmation bias is a real thing.  It narrows our potential for growth, by making us take the same decisions again, and again.  A whole lot of the golden age of sci-fi was built upon this concept, of arbitrary separation between groups.  From the outside, it looks ridiculous – see Let That Be Your Last Battlefield.

It’s possible for two people to have different opinions on a matter and both be correct, or both be wrong.  The context and perspective of each individual matters when forming an opinion.  Financial management is much different for someone with a relatively poor background vs someone with no financial burdens.  I get it.

But we didn’t get to this point in history without talking to other people.  Without trusting other people.  If we didn’t have disagreements we’d never have seen a telescope, a lightbulb, calculus, or space exploration.  Civilizations that became self-absorbed in their own righteousness rot from within.  As soon as we start suspecting our neighbors, we’re already heading down that slippery slope.

And to think, we have tons of history to show us the end result of that mindset.  We have much more in common with each other than differences.