I had mentioned a few months ago that I was going through a rough patch at work. I had stopped blogging and gaming for a while. Things were pretty bleak for a solid bit, then things started to get better. I am taking the month of August off, and planning to spend it with my family. They are the ones who got me through that mess and the reason I get up in the morning.
I met my wife to be at a stag & doe. It seemed like everyone there knew that we were supposed to meet there. I was nervous and anxious but she still stuck with me. Even our dates were a mess for me, I was simply out to lunch that I was meeting such an amazing woman. A bit more than a year later, we moved in together, then a year later we got married. Up until then, that was the best thing that could have happened to me.
A little while on, we had our first daughter. I had never been so proud of what we made. A bit later, another daughter. I can picture both days like it was yesterday.
For all the ups and downs, my only stable factor was my family. I love my dad to death, but it’s not one of those open emotional relationships. My brothers and sisters aren’t as close as we should be and I don’t talk to my mother. I’ve always been out to the side, but that changes when I met my wife and had kids. I love coming home to giant hugs and smiles.
These past few weeks have been exhausting. I am having a hard time juggling everything and its put a strain on all sorts of things. I thought I could scrape by the next few weeks, to end out the month and re-ground myself. I don’t know if I can make it though.
We all went to a pool party yesterday. Seeing my kids with nothing but smiles and getting to spend a lot of time with them was great. It really brought to home why I work, and what I’m missing by not being around as much as I’d like.
My wife and kids are out of the house for a bit and I don’t like the empty nest feeling. Never have. I need the noise and bustle. I need the laughs and the hugs. Life has thrown me so many curveballs that I thought I could handle them all and keep moving forward. The silence here is deafening. I hope their trip is a short one, I need their hugs.