I had mentioned a few months ago that I was going through a rough patch at work. I had stopped blogging and gaming for a while.  Things were pretty bleak for a solid bit, then things started to get better.  I am taking the month of August off, and planning to spend it with my family.  They are the ones who got me through that mess and the reason I get up in the morning.

I met my wife to be at a stag & doe.  It seemed like everyone there knew that we were supposed to meet there.  I was nervous and anxious but she still stuck with me.  Even our dates were a mess for me,  I was simply out to lunch that I was meeting such an amazing woman.  A bit more than a year later, we moved in together, then a year later we got married.   Up until then, that was the best thing that could have happened to me.

A little while on, we had our first daughter.  I had never been so proud of what we made.  A bit later, another daughter.  I can picture both days like it was yesterday.

For all the ups and downs, my only stable factor was my family.  I love my dad to death, but it’s not one of those open emotional relationships.  My brothers and sisters aren’t as close as we should be and I don’t talk to my mother.  I’ve always been out to the side, but that changes when I met my wife and had kids.  I love coming home to giant hugs and smiles.

These past few weeks have been exhausting.  I am having a hard time juggling everything and its put a strain on all sorts of things.  I thought I could scrape by the next few weeks, to end out the month and re-ground myself.  I don’t know if I can make it though.

We all went to a pool party yesterday.  Seeing my kids with nothing but smiles and getting to spend a lot of time with them was great.  It really brought to home why I work, and what I’m missing by not being around as much as I’d like.

My wife and kids are out of the house for a bit and I don’t like the empty nest feeling.  Never have.  I need the noise and bustle.  I need the laughs and the hugs.  Life has thrown me so many curveballs that I thought I could handle them all and keep moving forward.  The silence here is deafening.  I hope their trip is a short one, I need their hugs.